I promised I wouldn't lie....

Shit....I promised I wouldn't lie, so I can't. This is public as motivation for me to keep going to finish this half marathon.

I got back from a cruise yesterday. Now, this cruise was probably my 10th or 11th cruise. You could say I'm quite experienced when it comes to cruising. I know my stuff. I went on the Holland America Veendam, which might possibly be the absolute worst cruise ship currently sailing the seas. Now, I don't want to complain because I just went on a vacation. I definitely relaxed and had a few (x10) good laughs along the way. However, I will never again take a cruise on the Holland America line. Just to give you a peek at the complaints:

-I found a used loofah sponge in my shower.
-I found an old man's pair of blimp-sized tighty-whitey's in my drawer.
-There was rust all over the ship.
-There was absolutely nothing planned for passengers to do, minus the Lido deck golf tee competition that ended in a woman gushing blood from her head. (Smart idea Veendam...smart idea.)

Now this is just a glimpse and I'm sure it doesn't seem that bad, but my mother had a list going of about 25 by the second day of the vacation.

So, it might have been the worst cruise ship, however, we made the best of it. I just finished a week (that's a full seven days) of drinking and eating. I know everyone says this after they come back from vacation, but honestly...all day and all night, drinking and eating. It was actually pretty ridiculous. Every single night, we ordered room service, and every single morning we ordered room service BEFORE going to breakfast on the Lido deck. Absolutely sickening.

Kristen Greene (who came with me) and I tried to work out....once. We were sailing at this point. Let me just tell you, running on a treadmill on a moving boat just plain sucks. You are literally holding on for dear life because every twenty seconds you're being thrown to one side of the treadmill which completely throws off your balance. Kristen was beyond frustrated and freaked out. She got off the treadmill at about 1.25 miles and went down to shower. I finished my run, which was luckily only 2 miles.

Now after that experience, you would think we would never work out again on the ship. Well you're right...we didn't. (Even though the ship was docked for 3 days and we would have been just fine....I told you, I wouldn't lie to you.)

I'm not quite sure what was going through our minds, but we were determined to work out every day. Half of my suitcase was filled with work out clothes, and every morning I'd say: "This will be the day I start working out on vacation." And you know what happened every day...? I got drunk before I could work out.

There was nothing else to do on the ship! We'd be so bored, that we wouldn't know what to do, so we'd just go see Wang Wang. Wang Wang was our bartender, and no, his name is not Wang Wang. His name is actually Emerson and he's the shit. I think the reason we liked him so much is because within the first hour of our vacation he suggested we drink either a "BBC" or a "WANG WANG." I mean, how could you not love a guy like that?! After about 3 days of us Americans laughing at BBC, he finally asked why we were laughing. When we told him what it means "on the streets" he said he would never again suggest a BBC to an American.

Alright, so you caught me. I only worked out once in an entire seven days. I didn't think this would be a huge deal, but you guessed it...it was a huge deal. I just went to downtown Bethel and tried to run 8 miles. Try is the key word there because I, in fact, could not run 8 miles. I could not run more than 3 miles. At 3 miles, I was toast.

I'm not sure of the reason. There are three possibilities I was thinking about as I was basically dieing on the road:

1. I ate and drank my face off for a week.
2. I didn't work out at all during that week.
3. I ran on the road instead of on the treadmill which is indeed easier.

I've come to the conclusion, that it is a mixture of all three of these reasons. So I was pissed. I was really, really pissed at myself. So you may disappointed with me, but I am more disappointed. I guess I have to work myself up back to 8 miles. I will be running every day this week, so I'll keep you posted about what happens.

On a funnier note completely unrelated to running:

If you've ever played the game Catch Phrase, you know how unbelievably fun it is. It is a word game in which you have to get your team to guess the word that only you can see. To hear what people say can be pretty hilarious.

For example: I was visiting Brother in California a couple of years ago. We were playing this game and the word he was trying to make people guess was "Big Bird." Now, instead of saying a large, yellow, fluffy flying thing on Sesame Street, Jeff starts with "Okay 2 words, the first word...Tom Hanks was in this movie!" So I start yelling "Forrest Gump...Cast Away...You've Got Mail...Turner and Hooch!" Then the buzzer goes off. When Jeff told me his word was "Big Bird" I was on the flooring rolling. He went the most roundabout way to try to get me to guess the word big! He could've even said "opposite of little!"

So that is an example of how funny the game can be. (Which may not be too funny, this whole thing might be a "You had to be there" kind of thing, but oh well, I think it's hilarious.) We played on the cruise, and I never thought I would laugh at something said after the game.

Jeremy, Scott, Kristen, and I were playing. We were all doing pretty good, but there were some words the game was showing and we didn't know what or who they were. So we would always talk after each round and laugh about the words chosen and how we would choose to explain them.

The best, however, was when Jer said "Some of the words are just so ridiculous! Honestly, though...who is Pickle Spears?"

Take it in....

Yes, he asked who is Pickle Spears! I was literally hysterical for about 5 minutes, until I could catch my breath and I said "No, no, no...like an actual pickle." Then everyone started laughing, and then Kristen says "Ohhh...but...who would put a pickle on a stick??" Again...I was hysterical. It was the funniest round of Catch Phrase I've ever played.

Alright, sorry for the long post, but I figured since you haven't seen me for a week, it'd be alright.